While at a non-scheduled pit-stop on my annual Ozark back-road driving tour, a regular participant inquired of the owner if it was the oldest general store in Arkansas. We’ll call our participant Joe (name changed to protect the guilty). Our group has ingratiated itself to the proprietors of these charming little spots over the years, by making it a habit of showing our appreciation, in other words, over-spending (the truth is we have always felt like we have received the better end of the bargain). The owner recognized our motley group from years past and began regaling us with funny vignettes of the bucolic area; and soon confessed the winner of the title- an even older more remote general store/café circa 1890. It turned out to be a tiny speck on the map, far off the beaten path. After the mule trail ends, you take a vine……

Always one for adventure, our hero Joe assumed the responsibility to scout this new destination. As the crow flies, on a map, this was not that far. But the hills, hollers, and gravel roads necessitated the use of meandering paved roads for this group of highline sports cars. Fortunately, the circuitous route was exactly why we drive these roads (smiles per gallon).

The seating capacity of this entrancing establishment could never accommodate our whole group, but for thrill seekers wanting to turn back the clock, this is the destination.

Joe, a dyed-in-the-wool good ol’ boy who has never met a stranger, led his enthusiastic group to the General Store/ Café. Apparently, the menu specializes in cholesterol and sugar, meaning the food is fantastic.

Upon arrival, the scent of freshly baked coconut pies filled the air. Drunk on the aroma, our take-charge leader inquired about purchasing a whole pie. The waitress informed him that was impossible as they did not sell whole pies. Perturbed but not dissuaded, without skipping a beat, (while doing his best Jack Nicholson imitation), Joe asked how many pieces the pie would be cut into when properly cooled. The confused waitress thought about it for a minute and came up with the magic number, 6 pieces. Joe gave her a sly look and said “Ma’am I believe I’ll take 6 pieces out of that pie you’re takin’ out of the oven”. He paused a moment, chuckled, and added “No need to bother yourself by cutting it Ma’am, just give us 4 forks and we’ll take care of it for you”. Not surprisingly, even those who didn’t care for coconut said it was delicious.

As two of my suggested routes pass close enough to this location, another mile or so would prove most rewarding. Upon further consideration, however, I’ve decided a separate waiver may be required for this…. ‘Eat at your own risk’. Food that good must be bad for you.